I love the way you run down hills with your arms spread wide and say, "Weeeee!"
I love the way you skip every few steps while walking.
I love the way you jump off every curb.
I love the way you giggle with your hand up by your mouth.
I love that you jump from high places and know we'll catch you (whether or not we're ready).
I love that you pick flowers for me.
I love that you want me to play with you.
I love your eagerness to be helpful.
I love that you like to eat at Pa-chote-le and go to dematchstics class.
I love how proud you are of your dada "helping sick people at the hopistal."
I love that you will randomly nuzzle noses with me.
I love how sometimes in restaurants, you wave at every person.
I love that you couldn't fall back asleep at nap time because you were "having a picnic with Ariel."
I love how excited you are about every little thing you notice.
I love your eagerness to learn and that you truly think I have the answers to all of your questions.
Yours is one of the sweetest spirits I've ever known. I'm not sure if there's an age that's any cuter than almost-3.
Showing posts with label Audra. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Audra. Show all posts
Saturday, May 2, 2015
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
Amazed.
Audra has been 100% amazing me lately. Seriously. I've just been in awe of the things she does and puts together. She's so verbal for a baby her age (just shy of 15 months and speaking 22 words & signing 6 words) and is getting better and better about putting 1 word with the next to form a thought. (Example: more please [she signs while saying both of those] or signs eat then points to high chair.) I love that she is starting to communicate with us. It's making life so much easier!
I am in constant awe of this personality I'm seeing develop before my very eyes. She is quite seriously one of the bravest, toughest and most adventurous babies I've met. Our neighborhood park has a slide that's about 5 1/2 ft high. It has pretty wide steps that she's able to climb up on her own. This week, she got brave enough to go down it by herself. Usually Nic would go with her, but this particular time it was just her and me at the park & I wasn't going to attempt it with this big belly. I held her hands once she got to the top the first few times, then I backed further & further away & she just pushed off like it wasn't an issue! I caught her at the bottom of course. She always wants to climb, play, and explore. And in doing so, she often falls down and gets roughed up (it's what babies do). But she rarely ever cries! Even if she gets a scape, even if it BLEEDS, she usually never even makes a peep. Nic and I usually discover these things when changing her or holding her a bit later, and then feel bad that we aren't exactly sure when the injury happened. She's much more likely to cry because she's startled by something (like a hard fall on the kitchen floor) but she's over it within a minute. Amazing. I know some adults who aren't even this tough.
To contrast that tough, brave, adventurous spirit, she is also the most kind, loving, sweet & cuddly girl you could imagine. She truly loves to share and spend time with people. She will often get a book and then hand it to one of us and climb into our lap. She is known to give many spontaneous [STRONG!] hugs and kisses and to sign more and then point to one of us (as in "more mama" or "more dada"...isn't that the cutest thing ever??).
Earlier today, she woke up from her nap and was still chillin' in her crib, so Nic and I decided to go up and spy on her. We peeked through her open doorway and just laughed at what we saw. She was playing at first, then literally laid down and attempted to hug all of her toys that were in her crib at once! (She has 3 books, a doll (that used to be my mom's then mine), a monkey Buckly Boo and a puppy all that stay at the foot of her bed until she wakes up & plays with them.) Then she looked at one of the books (a Bedtime Prayers and Promises book that Nic's parents recorded for her) then after doing that for a minute, she stood up, held onto the crib rail and started dancing! Heehee! For like 10 seconds, she had a dance party (who needs music anyway?!), then she sat and looked at the book some more. This is our girl. Loving, inquisitive, FUN.
What did we do to deserve to be blessed with a daughter so amazing?
More about the vacation in a bit! ...and also Audra's room... So many things I want to write about! :D
I am in constant awe of this personality I'm seeing develop before my very eyes. She is quite seriously one of the bravest, toughest and most adventurous babies I've met. Our neighborhood park has a slide that's about 5 1/2 ft high. It has pretty wide steps that she's able to climb up on her own. This week, she got brave enough to go down it by herself. Usually Nic would go with her, but this particular time it was just her and me at the park & I wasn't going to attempt it with this big belly. I held her hands once she got to the top the first few times, then I backed further & further away & she just pushed off like it wasn't an issue! I caught her at the bottom of course. She always wants to climb, play, and explore. And in doing so, she often falls down and gets roughed up (it's what babies do). But she rarely ever cries! Even if she gets a scape, even if it BLEEDS, she usually never even makes a peep. Nic and I usually discover these things when changing her or holding her a bit later, and then feel bad that we aren't exactly sure when the injury happened. She's much more likely to cry because she's startled by something (like a hard fall on the kitchen floor) but she's over it within a minute. Amazing. I know some adults who aren't even this tough.
To contrast that tough, brave, adventurous spirit, she is also the most kind, loving, sweet & cuddly girl you could imagine. She truly loves to share and spend time with people. She will often get a book and then hand it to one of us and climb into our lap. She is known to give many spontaneous [STRONG!] hugs and kisses and to sign more and then point to one of us (as in "more mama" or "more dada"...isn't that the cutest thing ever??).
Earlier today, she woke up from her nap and was still chillin' in her crib, so Nic and I decided to go up and spy on her. We peeked through her open doorway and just laughed at what we saw. She was playing at first, then literally laid down and attempted to hug all of her toys that were in her crib at once! (She has 3 books, a doll (that used to be my mom's then mine), a monkey Buckly Boo and a puppy all that stay at the foot of her bed until she wakes up & plays with them.) Then she looked at one of the books (a Bedtime Prayers and Promises book that Nic's parents recorded for her) then after doing that for a minute, she stood up, held onto the crib rail and started dancing! Heehee! For like 10 seconds, she had a dance party (who needs music anyway?!), then she sat and looked at the book some more. This is our girl. Loving, inquisitive, FUN.
What did we do to deserve to be blessed with a daughter so amazing?
She got in this cart all on her own... seriously, nobody helped her one single bit.
Hugs for dad at bedtime.
Bedtime stories.
More about the vacation in a bit! ...and also Audra's room... So many things I want to write about! :D
Thursday, February 14, 2013
8 months & Lots of Firsts!
Well, I didn't get that extended vacation I so badly wanted last post, but I DID get some much needed girl time, have a birthday, and had my husband home for 3 whole nights in a row- which meant more sleep. All of those did this girl some good. I feel happier and a little more refreshed. And I feel like I'm in a much better place in mommyhood. Thanks for letting me vent and then being nice enough to still come back. :)
This past month has been quite an exciting one for Audra! She's experienced so many firsts... no wonder she was sleeping so badly before!
First time eating solid food:
We started with apples (not knowing that I was supposed to start w/ veggies... oops), and she loved them! Then we moved on to peas, squash-yellow, prunes (necessary!), green beans, pear, avocado, sweet potato, carrot, squash-butternut, egg yolk, and banana. I didn't really go in any particular order (other than following recommended food guides); we mostly just gave her what we already had on hand so minimize runs to the grocery store. We make our own food, and I have to say... I get a strange enjoyment out of it. I love making it and she loves eating it. While I do believe it's a money saver, the cost isn't really the reason we do it. I just like knowing EXACTLY what she's eating. And I like her getting the freshest food possible. And I like being able to puree it as thin or thick as I want. There are a lot of perks and it's just too easy NOT to do. I can do a whole post on how we make it, if anyone's interested. But if you don't tell me that you want to know, I'm not going to take the time to post it. ;) Heehee.
Along with the solids has come a lot more weight on this baby girl. And also, more sleep! She generally sleeps from 7p to anywhere between 5:30-7:30a. If she doesn't wake up at all in the night, she'll get up around 5:30. If she gets up for a night feed and goes back down, she'll sleep 'til around 7:30. I would gladly trade a night feed for sleeping in! I just wish she felt the same. :)
Other firsts:
Pulling herself to standing:
Very shortly after that, she started walking the length of her crib while holding on. Didn't get that one on video though.
Crawling:
This one was a long time coming! She'd been on all fours since well before Christmas. We were CERTAIN she'd start crawling while we were in Missouri. But then she got sick, and she was held a lot. So that didn't happen. She was up on all fours and going backwards a lot. Then she was up on all fours and crawling just one to three "steps", then she'd collapse onto the floor. She'd do that over and over. Just this week, she started connecting it all and going great distances without falling down. AND NOW? She's going anywhere, and getting into EVERYTHING! Haha! Time to baby-proof this place, for sure! Things she never seemed interested in before are now things for little baby hands to explore. It's funny how she sat right next to things (like a bookshelf) many times in the past, and now all of a sudden it's so interesting! She's starting to keep me on my toes, guys. :)
Talking:
It started with "mama" in beginning/mid January and then about 3 weeks later, both Nic and I swore she repeated "bye bye." And the very next day, she said "dada." Now we can catch her saying all 3. Though mama is still the most likely to repeated on demand.
Other fun non-milestone firsts that happened this past month:
-first time swinging in a big girl swing (well, toddler swing)
-first time riding in the stroller without her infant seat on top
-first time sitting in the wooden high chair in a restaurant
-first time riding in the grocery cart sitting space
-first time trying (very watered down) juice [no picture]
-first time sleeping without a swaddle (mentioned last post)
-first time eating outside
And I think that's it! It's been so much fun to watch her face each time she does something new. I love that she looks to me with excitement and is able to see that I'm sharing in it with her. I can't get enough of this sweet, sweet girl.
Oh! And Happy Valentine's Day! ♥
This past month has been quite an exciting one for Audra! She's experienced so many firsts... no wonder she was sleeping so badly before!
First time eating solid food:
Along with the solids has come a lot more weight on this baby girl. And also, more sleep! She generally sleeps from 7p to anywhere between 5:30-7:30a. If she doesn't wake up at all in the night, she'll get up around 5:30. If she gets up for a night feed and goes back down, she'll sleep 'til around 7:30. I would gladly trade a night feed for sleeping in! I just wish she felt the same. :)
Other firsts:
Pulling herself to standing:
Crawling:
Talking:
It started with "mama" in beginning/mid January and then about 3 weeks later, both Nic and I swore she repeated "bye bye." And the very next day, she said "dada." Now we can catch her saying all 3. Though mama is still the most likely to repeated on demand.
Other fun non-milestone firsts that happened this past month:
-first time swinging in a big girl swing (well, toddler swing)
-first time riding in the stroller without her infant seat on top
-first time sitting in the wooden high chair in a restaurant
-first time riding in the grocery cart sitting space
-first time trying (very watered down) juice [no picture]
-first time sleeping without a swaddle (mentioned last post)
-first time eating outside
And I think that's it! It's been so much fun to watch her face each time she does something new. I love that she looks to me with excitement and is able to see that I'm sharing in it with her. I can't get enough of this sweet, sweet girl.
Oh! And Happy Valentine's Day! ♥
Friday, February 1, 2013
Me, The Mom.
I am attempting to keep this blog a positive place. It's a place that has recently become all about Audra. I LOVE talking about Audra, mainly because I LOVE to be helpful to a lot of you reading. I know some of my favorite blogs are those where fellow mamas talk about their experiences, favorite products, and life in general with babies. They're helpful, and they prevent me from having to do a ton of research, especially if I feel that I identify with them and can trust their opinions.
But I think it's important to be honest, too. It's not fair to show you only the pretty side of things and make you think that's how it always is. I'm talking about how it's all about Audra. Not just my blog, now. MY LIFE. Don't get me wrong. I LOVE MY BABY MORE THAN I EVEN KNOW HOW TO PUT INTO WORDS. I would give my life for her! I can go on listing other ways to affirm to you how much I love her, but let's just call it good. I LOVE HER. There's no truer statement. But it gets overwhelming. It's such a place of limbo to be in; one that is implied a lot of time, but one that people also choose not to talk about a lot of time. I think it's because people, like this blog, mostly choose to focus on the positive. Because there is SO MUCH positive to focus on! A beautiful, gorgeous baby. Learning new things. Smiling. Kissing. Hugging. Babbling. Laughing. Loving me. But also. BUT ALSO... crying. Clawing at my face. Refusing to let me take a whole shower in peace. Whining when I try to pump. Waking me multiple times a night. Starting the morning with more crying. Refusing to eat the food I spent time making. And generally taking up every single minute of my time. Even when she's sleeping, she's taking up my time. I'm thinking of her. Educating myself on things for her. Buying things online for her. Writing this blog about her.
So I find myself in this limbo. On one side: loving this new life with our baby- both the good and the bad that come with it. And on the other: feeling selfish and wanting to hand her over to my or my husband's parents and just jet off to a sunny warm island and lay on the beach, drinking piña coladas and "forgetting" my baby. For just a little while. I say "forgetting" because I know that the second I hit that beach, I'll be wondering what Audra's up to and how she's doing, whether she's happy and sleeping well and eating her food, etc. I'm feeling like my brain is never going to rest again. And that's probably just the reality of it. But guys? My brain is TIRED. My BODY is tired. My holding-shiz-together-ness is feeling like it wants to quit. Not forever! Just for a little while. I need a break. I mean more than an afternoon. More than even a day, probably. And it can't happen here, at the house, because then I'd just end up cleaning or something, because my OCD self can't fully relax until there's nothing else to do.
Recently, Nic and I finally got to have a candid, honest conversation, and I ended in tears just telling him how tired I am. And how I don't feel like myself anymore. I used to be an adult. One who enjoyed good food and sitting on patios and Happy Hour with friends. One who saw movies in the theater kind of frequently and went shopping for clothes that are in season. And now? Now I feel a little trapped. Trapped because of breastfeeding (can't leave her with anyone for any extended length of time), trapped because of very delicate nap time hours (as I talked about last post ), trapped because of the amount of work that has fallen on my shoulders because of her, but at the same time less time to do it because of her. That's not to say this is ALWAYS how I feel. I think it's just been a very very long time since I've gotten to be... well... ME. Right now I feel like me, the mom. And then sometimes (if I don't fall asleep first), I'm me, the wife. And very very rarely do I get to be me, the adult in an adult world. Something's gotta give. There's got to be some way for me to recharge this mom battery of mine. I do know that this feeling goes away almost as quickly as it comes, but the fact of the matter is that this feeling still exists. And from what I'm reading around the web, it exists in a lot moms.
I HATE admitting this. I HATE the fact that this is sounding like complaining. Complaining is not how I intend this to sound. I mean it to be an honest look at the feelings of a stay-at-home-mom (perhaps ANY mom), from time to time.
It's important for me to stress how much I LOVE MY BABY. I wouldn't trade motherhood for a lifetime on warm, sandy beaches. I wouldn't trade it for anything. There are infinitely more good days than bad; more happy moments than stressful moments; more JOY and LOVE than anything else I can think of.
Sometimes a mom just needs an extended break to be... well... free from being a mom.
But I think it's important to be honest, too. It's not fair to show you only the pretty side of things and make you think that's how it always is. I'm talking about how it's all about Audra. Not just my blog, now. MY LIFE. Don't get me wrong. I LOVE MY BABY MORE THAN I EVEN KNOW HOW TO PUT INTO WORDS. I would give my life for her! I can go on listing other ways to affirm to you how much I love her, but let's just call it good. I LOVE HER. There's no truer statement. But it gets overwhelming. It's such a place of limbo to be in; one that is implied a lot of time, but one that people also choose not to talk about a lot of time. I think it's because people, like this blog, mostly choose to focus on the positive. Because there is SO MUCH positive to focus on! A beautiful, gorgeous baby. Learning new things. Smiling. Kissing. Hugging. Babbling. Laughing. Loving me. But also. BUT ALSO... crying. Clawing at my face. Refusing to let me take a whole shower in peace. Whining when I try to pump. Waking me multiple times a night. Starting the morning with more crying. Refusing to eat the food I spent time making. And generally taking up every single minute of my time. Even when she's sleeping, she's taking up my time. I'm thinking of her. Educating myself on things for her. Buying things online for her. Writing this blog about her.
So I find myself in this limbo. On one side: loving this new life with our baby- both the good and the bad that come with it. And on the other: feeling selfish and wanting to hand her over to my or my husband's parents and just jet off to a sunny warm island and lay on the beach, drinking piña coladas and "forgetting" my baby. For just a little while. I say "forgetting" because I know that the second I hit that beach, I'll be wondering what Audra's up to and how she's doing, whether she's happy and sleeping well and eating her food, etc. I'm feeling like my brain is never going to rest again. And that's probably just the reality of it. But guys? My brain is TIRED. My BODY is tired. My holding-shiz-together-ness is feeling like it wants to quit. Not forever! Just for a little while. I need a break. I mean more than an afternoon. More than even a day, probably. And it can't happen here, at the house, because then I'd just end up cleaning or something, because my OCD self can't fully relax until there's nothing else to do.
Recently, Nic and I finally got to have a candid, honest conversation, and I ended in tears just telling him how tired I am. And how I don't feel like myself anymore. I used to be an adult. One who enjoyed good food and sitting on patios and Happy Hour with friends. One who saw movies in the theater kind of frequently and went shopping for clothes that are in season. And now? Now I feel a little trapped. Trapped because of breastfeeding (can't leave her with anyone for any extended length of time), trapped because of very delicate nap time hours (as I talked about last post ), trapped because of the amount of work that has fallen on my shoulders because of her, but at the same time less time to do it because of her. That's not to say this is ALWAYS how I feel. I think it's just been a very very long time since I've gotten to be... well... ME. Right now I feel like me, the mom. And then sometimes (if I don't fall asleep first), I'm me, the wife. And very very rarely do I get to be me, the adult in an adult world. Something's gotta give. There's got to be some way for me to recharge this mom battery of mine. I do know that this feeling goes away almost as quickly as it comes, but the fact of the matter is that this feeling still exists. And from what I'm reading around the web, it exists in a lot moms.
I HATE admitting this. I HATE the fact that this is sounding like complaining. Complaining is not how I intend this to sound. I mean it to be an honest look at the feelings of a stay-at-home-mom (perhaps ANY mom), from time to time.
It's important for me to stress how much I LOVE MY BABY. I wouldn't trade motherhood for a lifetime on warm, sandy beaches. I wouldn't trade it for anything. There are infinitely more good days than bad; more happy moments than stressful moments; more JOY and LOVE than anything else I can think of.
Sometimes a mom just needs an extended break to be... well... free from being a mom.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
So This Is Love
A lullaby I love to sing:
A facial expression I love:
Sounds I love:
How I love to document memories:
So THIS is love.
A facial expression I love:
Sounds I love:
How I love to document memories:
So THIS is love.
Friday, November 16, 2012
Audra 5 months
Weight: 12 lbs, 13 oz.
Yep, she's our little pip squeak! She's definitely on the small end, but have you seen her parents? Or grandparents for that matter? There's not much hope for her in this department. She may be small, but she's incredibly strong! And that's all that really matters in this department. :)
Length: 24.5 in.
Again, on the smaller side.
Muscular Development:
Hands: She's grabbing everything all the time! If I'm not careful, she'll surprise me and grab things I don't want her to have (like my water glass that I'm holding in one hand or the tiny bowl that contains her rice cereal).
Arms: They don't flail as much as they used to. We're leaving one arm out of the swaddle for now, and it's working well. We hope to have both arms free around 6 months. She's gotten used to really extending those arms to get things that are seemingly out of reach.
Feet: She's definitely discovered them, and she holds them quite often. She hasn't started eating them yet.
Legs: These suckers are STRONG! She loves to stand, and can do so by only holding onto our hands. The balance is wobbly, but improving every day. She can stand next to her crib and support herself with the crib bars. She hasn't gotten brave enough to stand at arms length (i.e. she pretty much "hugs" the crib), but it's awesome that she can support herself.
Body: She can fully roll belly to back, and also back to belly. She can sit unsupported for long periods of time. When laying on her belly, she's starting to push herself forward with her legs to get things in front of her. I anticipate having a mobile baby very very soon!
Sleep:
Here's the tricky subject! Sleep had been pretty horrible for about the last month or so. She went from sleeping completely through the night to waking once in the night, to waking twice, then waking three times. And she was waking three times pretty consistently for a while. We attributed it to pain from teething (more about that in a minute). We talked with a nurse and were OKed to give her a higher dose of the Baby Tylenol. We've only given her the higher dose twice now. The first night she only woke up once, around 3. The second night (last night), she only woke up once at 5:45. I'll take waking up once over waking up 3 times ANY NIGHT! Knock on wood that the good sleep continues.
Teething:
I can't feel any bumps in her gums, but I can see the outline of the little teeth in the sides of her gums. She's drooling like crazy, and often whines when nursing. She goes to town on her Sophie giraffe and other teethers. We try to ease the pain as much as possible by giving her cool washcloths, numbing strips (only occasionally b/c I'm not convinced they work), and when really bad or before bed (when it seems to flair up), we give the Tylenol. Nic's mom ordered a teething necklace for her, and it should arrive before too long. This is a necklace that will get warmed by being against Audra's neck, and supposedly releases a chemical that is an anti-inflammatory. I've read many accounts that say this necklace works, and I'm willing to try almost anything to ease my stinker's pain. I hope it helps! Once she's 6 months, we'll give her Baby Ibuprofen, since it reduces inflammation as well.
Personality:
As long as she's getting to interact with someone, or less often- something, she's a happy girl! She definitely prefers people interaction over her toys. She loves to be held, even by strangers, and is very smiley. She's least happy when she's awake and people are around but not paying attention to her (as in a CrossFit scenario). Every now and then she'll be a simple observer, just still and watching, but most often she prefers to be interacting. She loves when we blow on her belly or make growl noises in her neck. She likes it when I kiss her feet and tickle her back. She has started to laugh and it is the most wonderful sound I've ever heard.
She's not generally hard to please. I've found if I just stay in the moment with her, interact with her and watch her cues, we can go a whole day without crying. Sometimes I get sidetracked doing other things, though, and it's those moments she starts to whine and cry as if to say, "Pay attention to me!" She sure does know how to get her way already. ;-)
Appetite:
She nurses 6-8 times a day for 20-30 min. We were having issues for a while due to her preferring the bottle, but I was patient and within a week things were back to normal. :) The only thing that hinders her eating now is her sore gums. I think sometimes it hurts her to get started on the boob, but once she gets going she seems to be ok. She bits sometimes, but I know it's only because it feels good on her gums. I yell, "No biting!" and she instantly lets go. I know she's not trying to hurt me. I feel bad for my baby being in pain.
In all, I'd say things couldn't be better! She's well out of her '4th Trimester' (if you aren't familiar with this concept from Happiest Baby on the Block, I suggest you look into it! If you have or are going to have a baby, that is). She's "generally accepted life" and I think she likes it!
We love her, and thank God every day for this little blessing He's given us. Sure, days are more exhausting and nights more tiresome, but I can't imagine not having her to love.
Yep, she's our little pip squeak! She's definitely on the small end, but have you seen her parents? Or grandparents for that matter? There's not much hope for her in this department. She may be small, but she's incredibly strong! And that's all that really matters in this department. :)
Length: 24.5 in.
Again, on the smaller side.
Muscular Development:
Hands: She's grabbing everything all the time! If I'm not careful, she'll surprise me and grab things I don't want her to have (like my water glass that I'm holding in one hand or the tiny bowl that contains her rice cereal).
Arms: They don't flail as much as they used to. We're leaving one arm out of the swaddle for now, and it's working well. We hope to have both arms free around 6 months. She's gotten used to really extending those arms to get things that are seemingly out of reach.
Feet: She's definitely discovered them, and she holds them quite often. She hasn't started eating them yet.
Legs: These suckers are STRONG! She loves to stand, and can do so by only holding onto our hands. The balance is wobbly, but improving every day. She can stand next to her crib and support herself with the crib bars. She hasn't gotten brave enough to stand at arms length (i.e. she pretty much "hugs" the crib), but it's awesome that she can support herself.
Body: She can fully roll belly to back, and also back to belly. She can sit unsupported for long periods of time. When laying on her belly, she's starting to push herself forward with her legs to get things in front of her. I anticipate having a mobile baby very very soon!
Sleep:
Here's the tricky subject! Sleep had been pretty horrible for about the last month or so. She went from sleeping completely through the night to waking once in the night, to waking twice, then waking three times. And she was waking three times pretty consistently for a while. We attributed it to pain from teething (more about that in a minute). We talked with a nurse and were OKed to give her a higher dose of the Baby Tylenol. We've only given her the higher dose twice now. The first night she only woke up once, around 3. The second night (last night), she only woke up once at 5:45. I'll take waking up once over waking up 3 times ANY NIGHT! Knock on wood that the good sleep continues.
I can't feel any bumps in her gums, but I can see the outline of the little teeth in the sides of her gums. She's drooling like crazy, and often whines when nursing. She goes to town on her Sophie giraffe and other teethers. We try to ease the pain as much as possible by giving her cool washcloths, numbing strips (only occasionally b/c I'm not convinced they work), and when really bad or before bed (when it seems to flair up), we give the Tylenol. Nic's mom ordered a teething necklace for her, and it should arrive before too long. This is a necklace that will get warmed by being against Audra's neck, and supposedly releases a chemical that is an anti-inflammatory. I've read many accounts that say this necklace works, and I'm willing to try almost anything to ease my stinker's pain. I hope it helps! Once she's 6 months, we'll give her Baby Ibuprofen, since it reduces inflammation as well.
As long as she's getting to interact with someone, or less often- something, she's a happy girl! She definitely prefers people interaction over her toys. She loves to be held, even by strangers, and is very smiley. She's least happy when she's awake and people are around but not paying attention to her (as in a CrossFit scenario). Every now and then she'll be a simple observer, just still and watching, but most often she prefers to be interacting. She loves when we blow on her belly or make growl noises in her neck. She likes it when I kiss her feet and tickle her back. She has started to laugh and it is the most wonderful sound I've ever heard.
She's not generally hard to please. I've found if I just stay in the moment with her, interact with her and watch her cues, we can go a whole day without crying. Sometimes I get sidetracked doing other things, though, and it's those moments she starts to whine and cry as if to say, "Pay attention to me!" She sure does know how to get her way already. ;-)
I can always try for that one last picture, but when she says it's nap time, IT'S NAP TIME! ;-)
She nurses 6-8 times a day for 20-30 min. We were having issues for a while due to her preferring the bottle, but I was patient and within a week things were back to normal. :) The only thing that hinders her eating now is her sore gums. I think sometimes it hurts her to get started on the boob, but once she gets going she seems to be ok. She bits sometimes, but I know it's only because it feels good on her gums. I yell, "No biting!" and she instantly lets go. I know she's not trying to hurt me. I feel bad for my baby being in pain.
This was actually the very first shot of this little photo session. Of course, she spits up on the backdrop and her outfit!
In all, I'd say things couldn't be better! She's well out of her '4th Trimester' (if you aren't familiar with this concept from Happiest Baby on the Block, I suggest you look into it! If you have or are going to have a baby, that is). She's "generally accepted life" and I think she likes it!
We love her, and thank God every day for this little blessing He's given us. Sure, days are more exhausting and nights more tiresome, but I can't imagine not having her to love.
Thursday, November 1, 2012
Stronger Than Yesterday
I'm not sure if you heard, but there was this storm, er... small HURRICANE... named Sandy... that recently came our way. We stocked up on all the essentials and did all the things we were told to do that I knew nothing about before we moved here. (Did you know to fill up your bathtub so your toilet will flush? Or to buy ice ahead of time because it sells out due to refrigerators being out with power?) The bummer part of it all was that we knew Nic would be working the day the storm was scheduled to hit (Monday). Saturday night, he got a call from his Major telling him to come in at 0600 Sunday to wait out the storm. They wanted to make sure all hospital employees would be able to report to duty, so they called them all in early. Which left me and the stinker home alone. :-( I knew we had everything we needed, but just the thought of the storm raging outside made me nervous. Things really couldn't have gone better, though. I stayed strong pretty much all day, and well into the evening, but after putting Audra to bed my thoughts began to wander. Sunday night, I went to bed knowing this huge red storm cell was immediately Southeast of us, and was scheduled to go right over us before normal waking hours. My stomach was tight with worry, but I forced myself to sleep. Audra woke up around 2am to eat, and during those dark, quiet hours, I began to run all these scenarios through my head that Nic and I hadn't discussed. What if they come to our door and tell me I have to evacuate and they won't let me wait for Nic to get back from the hospital? What if we have to evacuate, and Nic's on his way home but finds that an essential street is flooded? What if the cell towers are down and one of these things happens and we can't get ahold of each other? (That was my biggest worry.) The last thing I ever wanted was to be separated from Nic in this middle of this crazy hurricane tropical storm and not know how to find him. I called him around 3am, and just hearing his voice put my fears at ease. He assured me that they wouldn't make me leave the house immediately if we should evacuate. He would find me. He mostly told me to stop worrying and reminded me that we faced wind storms in Lubbock with much higher winds than this hurricane tropical storm was producing. Sigh. I wish I didn't have to think of every.single.little.thing that could go wrong. This is one time when it doesn't pay to be detail oriented. :-( Of course, it all ended up going off without a hitch in our area. We didn't even lose power. The eye of the storm just missed us; went directly north of us, so we just got the outer edges. Thank you, God! They even let Nic come home a day early (Monday night instead of Tuesday night). It was nice to see him again. :)
Unrelated to the storm, I've been really trying to hit the CrossFit hard lately. Nic reminds me quite often that we're paying for me and that we should just cancel my membership if I'm not going to make it a point to go. I seem to always find fifty million other things Ineed want to do when it comes time to work out. (The dishes! My nails! Finally time to just relax ALONE!) But these last few times, I begrudgingly drug my feet to get there, and have always been happy upon leaving. It's such a triumphant feeling walking out of a place with an endorphin high that you almost decided not to have. Not to mention that it really helps when more and more clothes start to fit like they used to. I've noticed a difference in my workouts as well. I'm getting stronger each time and don't quite feel like I'm going to die in the run during the warm-up like I used to. :)
Remember my last post in which I told you I had the stomach flu a few weeks back? Well, I had no idea how much the stomach flu could affect breast feeding. It makes sense; I lost nearly all the liquid in my body, and there was next to nothing for them to use to produce. Audra was fed many times that day with a bottle, despite my best efforts and desires to feed her myself. (It's hard to feed a baby when they feel like they weigh a ton!) Ever since then, Audra's shown definite preference for the bottle, and has gotten extremely lazy on the boob. She's supposed to be what helps me produce, and that's not working out so well when she just expects my boob to hand it to her (despite us using the slowest flowing bottle nipple we could find). So lately, we've had many feeding sessions with her whining the whole time, and me just saying, "It's there, girl, just eat!" So we're on a strict No Bottle policy for the next week or so and I'm doing all the tricks I can think of. (Fenugreek, oatmeal, pumping after nursing, letting her stay on & suckle if she falls asleep.) I'd appreciate your prayers, though. This is definitely stressing me out (& I know stress doesn't help) and testing my faith in my ability to do this. I KNOW I'm not going to give up. She would have to be literally losing weight and crying out of hunger for me to quit breastfeeding or supplement with formula. It's just hard to be patient. I've done some research, and I'm doing all of the things they say to do. They say just be patient. I'm hoping eventually she'll realize she's not going to get a bottle again and she'll start eating like her old self when she really wants it bad enough.
So it's definitely a time of new-found strength, in many ways.
As usual, I hope this finds you happy, healthy, & well. I so appreciate you reading. :-)
Unrelated to the storm, I've been really trying to hit the CrossFit hard lately. Nic reminds me quite often that we're paying for me and that we should just cancel my membership if I'm not going to make it a point to go. I seem to always find fifty million other things I
Remember my last post in which I told you I had the stomach flu a few weeks back? Well, I had no idea how much the stomach flu could affect breast feeding. It makes sense; I lost nearly all the liquid in my body, and there was next to nothing for them to use to produce. Audra was fed many times that day with a bottle, despite my best efforts and desires to feed her myself. (It's hard to feed a baby when they feel like they weigh a ton!) Ever since then, Audra's shown definite preference for the bottle, and has gotten extremely lazy on the boob. She's supposed to be what helps me produce, and that's not working out so well when she just expects my boob to hand it to her (despite us using the slowest flowing bottle nipple we could find). So lately, we've had many feeding sessions with her whining the whole time, and me just saying, "It's there, girl, just eat!" So we're on a strict No Bottle policy for the next week or so and I'm doing all the tricks I can think of. (Fenugreek, oatmeal, pumping after nursing, letting her stay on & suckle if she falls asleep.) I'd appreciate your prayers, though. This is definitely stressing me out (& I know stress doesn't help) and testing my faith in my ability to do this. I KNOW I'm not going to give up. She would have to be literally losing weight and crying out of hunger for me to quit breastfeeding or supplement with formula. It's just hard to be patient. I've done some research, and I'm doing all of the things they say to do. They say just be patient. I'm hoping eventually she'll realize she's not going to get a bottle again and she'll start eating like her old self when she really wants it bad enough.
So it's definitely a time of new-found strength, in many ways.
As usual, I hope this finds you happy, healthy, & well. I so appreciate you reading. :-)
Sunday, August 5, 2012
My 2nd BIG DAY (AUDRA is BORN!!!)
Marrying Nic will always be my 1st BIG DAY. It
was a wonderful, magical day, set by the sea and included a small group
of our closest family and a few friends. Giving birth to Audra will
forever be my 2nd BIG DAY.
My last post left off when I got admitted into San Antonio Military Medical Center (SAMMC) around 2am on Sunday, June 10th. I was just ecstatic that I was dilated to a 4. The contractions weren’t all that fun, of course, but I WOULD BE HAVING A BABY VERY VERY SOON!!! Part of me wanted to cry (already!) because I was so happy; the other part of me wanted to cry because I knew this was only the beginning and I would be in so.much.pain. in the very near future. While I was still in the 1st room (the triage room before a more permanent room is assigned), an anesthesiologist came in to tell me all of my options.
From even before I was pregnant, I had always wanted to have a natural delivery. I don't know if it's that I wanted to be tough, or if it was the negative effects of certain medications that I learned about from documentaries like The Business of Being Born or Born in America, but either way- I felt I had a pretty high pain tolerance and I really was up for the challenge. Every time I've had to over come some sort of pain in life, I've always felt better and stronger for it. So was my goal for delivery.
So in walks the anesthesiologist, and I'm all I'll listen, but I won't be needing that. He had to give his shpiel anyway, and I was intrigued when he said that epidurals don't effect the baby. I'd always heard that they do-- that the baby can be groggy, and a few other things. I don't know if he meant HIS epidurals don't effect the baby, or if the type he uses doesn't... I'm just not sure why his information was contrasting to what I'd heard. Regardless, I wasn't interested. He told me that he'd be in a c-section for a while, should I change my mind, and yada yada yada... that's all good and thanks for telling me.
Around 3:30 or 4am, I get moved into my delivery room. The contractions were becoming much more intense. I really had to stop everything and breathe through them. Looking back, I know that a lot of things needed to be different in that room: 1) The lights needed to be lower, 2) The nurse needed to LET ME GET IN A ZONE. The nurse I had was a SPAZ. She sort of looked like a drug addict (way too thin, highlights grown out), and she was all over the place. She insisted that she had to keep the monitors on me to monitor the baby, even though my water hadn't broken and I've NEVER had any reason to need monitoring. Every time she put the monitor on my stomach, it slid to a spot that made me have a contraction. After a few times, I started to see the pattern of monitor=contraction. Since the contractions were so painful, I was really squirming from the pain each time she put it on. Then it would slide, I'd have a contraction, and the whole thing would start over again. We seriously did this for about 2 hours. There was no "zone" involved. All through this, she's practically screaming, "We HAVE to monitor THE BABY!" I'm all, "OK!!" and she puts it on me, it slides from all the gel again, I have a contraction and she freaks out again because OMG THE MONITOR ISN'T ON THE BABY--- WE HAVE TO MONITOR THE BABY!!! All through the classes I attended, particularly the Natural Childbirth class, I'd been told how you just have to find your ZONE. I couldn't find my zone. Not at all. As a result, I wasn't able to breathe through the pain like I'd been taught, or to imagine those warm sunny places, or picture myself as a strong African woman who can get through anything (for some reason, I think of Sojourner Truth), or to think of the contractions like going up a big hill, then back down. NO, I DIDN'T GET TO do any of that. All I got to do is be annoyed by the stupid nurse and just complain to Nic about how bad it hurt.
Nobody ever tells you what that pain is like. Everyone I knew that'd had a baby was all, ya- it hurts! But nobody tells you the details. Nobody told me that the contractions would take all that my body had; would make me weak in the knees and make me feel like throwing up. They didn't tell me that my body would become so tired from working that every muscle would twitch. I remember looking at Nic, my eyebrows were twitching and my eyes themselves twitching, my lips were trembling, and he said it: Are you having second thoughts about the epidural?... Of course, I'd thought about it! I was glad he said something, because if he hadn't, I would have before too long. He was so loving and told me to go ahead and do it, that he wouldn't think less of me at all. He continually reassured me that there was no way to predict this feeling, and he knew the epidural would help. So around 6:20 we told the spaz that we'd decided to get the epidural. At some point during all of that, my parents had texted Nic to see if they could come back. Seeing as I was in the worst pain of my life, I was in no mood for visitors. I told them, sorry, not right now.
And thus begins our new problem: remember that little bit of information :::...I'll be in a c-section for a while if you change your mind...::: ...I changed my mind. And he was in a c-section. It felt like ETERNITY before he finally got there, but in reality I think it was only 25 minutes. Keep in mind that my pain was to a point that I wanted it that instant, so 25 minutes later it had continued to grow. Someone came in to check dilation shortly before the anesthesiologist got there, and that person said I was dilated at a 7, almost an 8 (out of 10 in case you don't know much about birthing). The anesthesiologist finally came in around 6:45, and told me that I needed to be still while he injected the needle, which would be 10-15 minutes. When your body is spasming and you're in so much pain, it's hard to sit still. Nic stood in front of me, and bore what is now one of my favorite labor memories. I put my head on his shoulder and breathed in his neck; he took long deep breaths and told me to copy him, and I did. That was EXTREMELY helpful, and both of us asked why we didn't remember to breathe like that sooner. Oops. Oh well. [Upon reading this post, Nic says we couldn't remember the right way to breathe because the drug-addict/spaz was too distracting.] Within minutes of the epidural, I felt next to no pain at all. It was amazing. AND I could still move my legs, which I'd always heard I would be unable to do. I told Nic my parents could come back now. We sat and visited for a while, and when Matt & Abi arrived at the hospital, they joined us in the room too. It really was amazing how much better the epidural made me feel. It's important for me to say here, that I have a CRAZY WONDERFUL amount of respect for any woman that gives birth without an epidural. To know that you went through that pain and did so without any numbing is mind-blowing. You will forever be a strong and amazing person for that.
The spaz finally gave report to our new nurse around 7 am. Our new nurse's name was (get this)... AUDRA! And she was the most lovely nurse I could have ever hoped for. I wish she were my night nurse. She was pretty and funny and made me feel completely comfortable and not at all self-conscious. So Matt, Abi, my parents, and Nic and I just sat (well, I layed) visiting for a while. I drifted in and out of sleep since I was tired from Friday's events, and from being up all night Saturday into Sunday. Around 9:30, a doctor checks dilation and breaks my water. I don't remember how far dilation was at this point (to be honest, I was kind of out of it). She also says I should be able to start pushing around 10:30. EEEK! Pushing?!? That definitely made me nervous. But I was too sleepy to get all worked up at that very moment.
Everyone's talking, and I'm sleeping, and in walk all of these people and someone loudly says, "Are you ready to have a baby? It's time to push!" I look at the clock and it wasn't even 10:30 yet. I think it was around 10:25. All of my family except Nic leaves, and I start feeling very overwhelmed. They really startled me from my sleep, and I hadn't had time to process all that was going on in that moment. (Nic jokes that he forgot to tell them I need to look at Facebook on my phone for about 10 minutes, then they could have continued; this is my usual wake-up routine.) (...pre-baby wake up routine that is...) It just seemed that I was sleeping, then all of a sudden, Audra (my nurse) and other people are standing over me, explaining how to push. I'm too confused to even listen to their directions. I just start half-way crying, saying I don't know HOW to push! They all insisted they'd tell me what to do as it happened, but to get ready because when the next contraction came, I would be pushing.
By this point, the epidural had worn off enough for me to know when I was having a contraction. I could feel it building and they told me alright, take a deep breath and push! They held my legs and counted to 10 while I pushed, then once they got to 10, they quickly said "take another deep breath and PUSH!" so I did while they counted to 10 again. By the second 10, the contraction was over so I rested to gear up for the next push. I was so numb down there from the epidural, I had no idea what was going on. After about 3 contractions of pushing, I asked Nic "Is she out?!?" Nic laughed and said no, that he couldn't even see her yet. The doctor said she was making her way around the pelvic bone. I pushed a total of about 50 minutes. Our little Audra was born at 11:17am. I gave my last, hardest push then they pulled her out and immediately placed her on my chest and covered us with a blanket. Nic and I both cried tears of joy and I just kept looking at her in disbelief and feeling her warm slimy little body. I'd waited so long for that moment, and there it was. So THAT is what it's like to have a baby.
We cuddled for a bit, then it was cut abruptly short. The doctor informed me that I had a tear they needed to stitch up, and the lighting in the delivery room wasn't bright enough for them to see. The doctor explained that I didn't tear on the outside, like I was probably thinking, but instead my tear was vertical up the vaginal wall. That's why they needed better lighting. I had never in my life heard of a tear like that happening during birth, so I was kind of surprised. Thank God I'd gotten the epidural! I was completely oblivious to the tear. :) And I really wasn't all too worried about it; I had a new little baby to be excited about!
They whisked me off to the OR while Nic got to stay in the delivery room and give Audra her first bath. A nice nurse took some pictures of him. As I lay there on the operating table, tears came to my eyes. It was the first time I was able to take it all in. I'd just had our little baby. On Sunday. And Matt & Abi were still there; my dad was there; Nic was off work. It was the most perfect timing imaginable. I got weepy realizing it had to be God helping us in all of this. Any time I doubt or am scared, He's always come through and blessed me even more than I could have imagined. I prayed for a while on that operating room table, and eventually fell asleep. I just had to ask, out of curiosity, how big the tear was. The doctor informed me that it was about 5 inches straight up the vaginal wall. This tear has (obviously) caused me a lot of discomfort, and is something that is still sore to this day (almost 2 months later). It's nowhere near as painful as it was the 1st days after I delivered. If feeling 100% is the goal, I'd say I'm at about a 90. The worst part about it is how much it's prevented me from doing, namely CrossFit.
So I got stitched up, and then joined my little family in the delivery room. The three of us cuddled as a family for a while, and I fed Audra for the first time. After a while, Mom, Dad, Matt & Abi came in and met Audra. It was a really exciting time for all of us. After a few hours, I moved to post-partum. And thus began life with a baby: never really sleeping, always looking at her, and learning what it feels like to be a mommy.
The first few days, I remember being EXTREMELY overwhelmed with love, and lots of worry for our little baby. I'm sure it was largely due to the hormones adjusting, but I would sometimes start crying, thinking about something bad ever happening to her. I would tell Nic, what if other kids are mean to her? What if someone tries to hurt her? What if she gets kidnapped? I just want her to be happy... I would worry that she'd stop breathing in the middle of the night and die from SIDS, or that she'd slip out of her swing somehow and it would keep swinging and attacking her and she'd die. She was (is) so small and helpless. I just felt an overwhelming desire to make all things GOOD for her. All of those 'what ifs' were really getting to me. He finally said something that really hit home for me: God was with her on the day she was born, and He'll be with her throughout her life. Knowing this has helped me when I start to think about all of those 'what ifs' again.
As I type this, she's sitting in my lap, babbling her cute little baby talk and her arm is somewhat flailing about since she still doesn't have gross motor control. She is the most beautiful, sweet baby that I've ever seen. Even when she wakes up at the crack of dawn, for a moment I think, UGH, awake already... but then I see her sweet face, and sometimes she even smiles, then my heart melts and I am JUST SO HAPPY to see and be with my sweet little baby again.
She is truly a blessing, and I thank God for her every day, multiple times a day. Now that we're in Virgina, we're really getting a chance to be together and get to know each other. She's one funny, gassy little gal! ;) We waited for her arrival for so.SO.long, and wondered what that day would be like. It's nice to know that it's over, and it worked out PERFECTLY and now we have a cute little wiggly baby to hold and love.
My last post left off when I got admitted into San Antonio Military Medical Center (SAMMC) around 2am on Sunday, June 10th. I was just ecstatic that I was dilated to a 4. The contractions weren’t all that fun, of course, but I WOULD BE HAVING A BABY VERY VERY SOON!!! Part of me wanted to cry (already!) because I was so happy; the other part of me wanted to cry because I knew this was only the beginning and I would be in so.much.pain. in the very near future. While I was still in the 1st room (the triage room before a more permanent room is assigned), an anesthesiologist came in to tell me all of my options.
From even before I was pregnant, I had always wanted to have a natural delivery. I don't know if it's that I wanted to be tough, or if it was the negative effects of certain medications that I learned about from documentaries like The Business of Being Born or Born in America, but either way- I felt I had a pretty high pain tolerance and I really was up for the challenge. Every time I've had to over come some sort of pain in life, I've always felt better and stronger for it. So was my goal for delivery.
So in walks the anesthesiologist, and I'm all I'll listen, but I won't be needing that. He had to give his shpiel anyway, and I was intrigued when he said that epidurals don't effect the baby. I'd always heard that they do-- that the baby can be groggy, and a few other things. I don't know if he meant HIS epidurals don't effect the baby, or if the type he uses doesn't... I'm just not sure why his information was contrasting to what I'd heard. Regardless, I wasn't interested. He told me that he'd be in a c-section for a while, should I change my mind, and yada yada yada... that's all good and thanks for telling me.
Around 3:30 or 4am, I get moved into my delivery room. The contractions were becoming much more intense. I really had to stop everything and breathe through them. Looking back, I know that a lot of things needed to be different in that room: 1) The lights needed to be lower, 2) The nurse needed to LET ME GET IN A ZONE. The nurse I had was a SPAZ. She sort of looked like a drug addict (way too thin, highlights grown out), and she was all over the place. She insisted that she had to keep the monitors on me to monitor the baby, even though my water hadn't broken and I've NEVER had any reason to need monitoring. Every time she put the monitor on my stomach, it slid to a spot that made me have a contraction. After a few times, I started to see the pattern of monitor=contraction. Since the contractions were so painful, I was really squirming from the pain each time she put it on. Then it would slide, I'd have a contraction, and the whole thing would start over again. We seriously did this for about 2 hours. There was no "zone" involved. All through this, she's practically screaming, "We HAVE to monitor THE BABY!" I'm all, "OK!!" and she puts it on me, it slides from all the gel again, I have a contraction and she freaks out again because OMG THE MONITOR ISN'T ON THE BABY--- WE HAVE TO MONITOR THE BABY!!! All through the classes I attended, particularly the Natural Childbirth class, I'd been told how you just have to find your ZONE. I couldn't find my zone. Not at all. As a result, I wasn't able to breathe through the pain like I'd been taught, or to imagine those warm sunny places, or picture myself as a strong African woman who can get through anything (for some reason, I think of Sojourner Truth), or to think of the contractions like going up a big hill, then back down. NO, I DIDN'T GET TO do any of that. All I got to do is be annoyed by the stupid nurse and just complain to Nic about how bad it hurt.
Nobody ever tells you what that pain is like. Everyone I knew that'd had a baby was all, ya- it hurts! But nobody tells you the details. Nobody told me that the contractions would take all that my body had; would make me weak in the knees and make me feel like throwing up. They didn't tell me that my body would become so tired from working that every muscle would twitch. I remember looking at Nic, my eyebrows were twitching and my eyes themselves twitching, my lips were trembling, and he said it: Are you having second thoughts about the epidural?... Of course, I'd thought about it! I was glad he said something, because if he hadn't, I would have before too long. He was so loving and told me to go ahead and do it, that he wouldn't think less of me at all. He continually reassured me that there was no way to predict this feeling, and he knew the epidural would help. So around 6:20 we told the spaz that we'd decided to get the epidural. At some point during all of that, my parents had texted Nic to see if they could come back. Seeing as I was in the worst pain of my life, I was in no mood for visitors. I told them, sorry, not right now.
And thus begins our new problem: remember that little bit of information :::...I'll be in a c-section for a while if you change your mind...::: ...I changed my mind. And he was in a c-section. It felt like ETERNITY before he finally got there, but in reality I think it was only 25 minutes. Keep in mind that my pain was to a point that I wanted it that instant, so 25 minutes later it had continued to grow. Someone came in to check dilation shortly before the anesthesiologist got there, and that person said I was dilated at a 7, almost an 8 (out of 10 in case you don't know much about birthing). The anesthesiologist finally came in around 6:45, and told me that I needed to be still while he injected the needle, which would be 10-15 minutes. When your body is spasming and you're in so much pain, it's hard to sit still. Nic stood in front of me, and bore what is now one of my favorite labor memories. I put my head on his shoulder and breathed in his neck; he took long deep breaths and told me to copy him, and I did. That was EXTREMELY helpful, and both of us asked why we didn't remember to breathe like that sooner. Oops. Oh well. [Upon reading this post, Nic says we couldn't remember the right way to breathe because the drug-addict/spaz was too distracting.] Within minutes of the epidural, I felt next to no pain at all. It was amazing. AND I could still move my legs, which I'd always heard I would be unable to do. I told Nic my parents could come back now. We sat and visited for a while, and when Matt & Abi arrived at the hospital, they joined us in the room too. It really was amazing how much better the epidural made me feel. It's important for me to say here, that I have a CRAZY WONDERFUL amount of respect for any woman that gives birth without an epidural. To know that you went through that pain and did so without any numbing is mind-blowing. You will forever be a strong and amazing person for that.
Waiting...
The spaz finally gave report to our new nurse around 7 am. Our new nurse's name was (get this)... AUDRA! And she was the most lovely nurse I could have ever hoped for. I wish she were my night nurse. She was pretty and funny and made me feel completely comfortable and not at all self-conscious. So Matt, Abi, my parents, and Nic and I just sat (well, I layed) visiting for a while. I drifted in and out of sleep since I was tired from Friday's events, and from being up all night Saturday into Sunday. Around 9:30, a doctor checks dilation and breaks my water. I don't remember how far dilation was at this point (to be honest, I was kind of out of it). She also says I should be able to start pushing around 10:30. EEEK! Pushing?!? That definitely made me nervous. But I was too sleepy to get all worked up at that very moment.
Everyone's talking, and I'm sleeping, and in walk all of these people and someone loudly says, "Are you ready to have a baby? It's time to push!" I look at the clock and it wasn't even 10:30 yet. I think it was around 10:25. All of my family except Nic leaves, and I start feeling very overwhelmed. They really startled me from my sleep, and I hadn't had time to process all that was going on in that moment. (Nic jokes that he forgot to tell them I need to look at Facebook on my phone for about 10 minutes, then they could have continued; this is my usual wake-up routine.) (...pre-baby wake up routine that is...) It just seemed that I was sleeping, then all of a sudden, Audra (my nurse) and other people are standing over me, explaining how to push. I'm too confused to even listen to their directions. I just start half-way crying, saying I don't know HOW to push! They all insisted they'd tell me what to do as it happened, but to get ready because when the next contraction came, I would be pushing.
By this point, the epidural had worn off enough for me to know when I was having a contraction. I could feel it building and they told me alright, take a deep breath and push! They held my legs and counted to 10 while I pushed, then once they got to 10, they quickly said "take another deep breath and PUSH!" so I did while they counted to 10 again. By the second 10, the contraction was over so I rested to gear up for the next push. I was so numb down there from the epidural, I had no idea what was going on. After about 3 contractions of pushing, I asked Nic "Is she out?!?" Nic laughed and said no, that he couldn't even see her yet. The doctor said she was making her way around the pelvic bone. I pushed a total of about 50 minutes. Our little Audra was born at 11:17am. I gave my last, hardest push then they pulled her out and immediately placed her on my chest and covered us with a blanket. Nic and I both cried tears of joy and I just kept looking at her in disbelief and feeling her warm slimy little body. I'd waited so long for that moment, and there it was. So THAT is what it's like to have a baby.
We cuddled for a bit, then it was cut abruptly short. The doctor informed me that I had a tear they needed to stitch up, and the lighting in the delivery room wasn't bright enough for them to see. The doctor explained that I didn't tear on the outside, like I was probably thinking, but instead my tear was vertical up the vaginal wall. That's why they needed better lighting. I had never in my life heard of a tear like that happening during birth, so I was kind of surprised. Thank God I'd gotten the epidural! I was completely oblivious to the tear. :) And I really wasn't all too worried about it; I had a new little baby to be excited about!
They whisked me off to the OR while Nic got to stay in the delivery room and give Audra her first bath. A nice nurse took some pictures of him. As I lay there on the operating table, tears came to my eyes. It was the first time I was able to take it all in. I'd just had our little baby. On Sunday. And Matt & Abi were still there; my dad was there; Nic was off work. It was the most perfect timing imaginable. I got weepy realizing it had to be God helping us in all of this. Any time I doubt or am scared, He's always come through and blessed me even more than I could have imagined. I prayed for a while on that operating room table, and eventually fell asleep. I just had to ask, out of curiosity, how big the tear was. The doctor informed me that it was about 5 inches straight up the vaginal wall. This tear has (obviously) caused me a lot of discomfort, and is something that is still sore to this day (almost 2 months later). It's nowhere near as painful as it was the 1st days after I delivered. If feeling 100% is the goal, I'd say I'm at about a 90. The worst part about it is how much it's prevented me from doing, namely CrossFit.
Baby's First Bath
So I got stitched up, and then joined my little family in the delivery room. The three of us cuddled as a family for a while, and I fed Audra for the first time. After a while, Mom, Dad, Matt & Abi came in and met Audra. It was a really exciting time for all of us. After a few hours, I moved to post-partum. And thus began life with a baby: never really sleeping, always looking at her, and learning what it feels like to be a mommy.
The happy family.
The first few days, I remember being EXTREMELY overwhelmed with love, and lots of worry for our little baby. I'm sure it was largely due to the hormones adjusting, but I would sometimes start crying, thinking about something bad ever happening to her. I would tell Nic, what if other kids are mean to her? What if someone tries to hurt her? What if she gets kidnapped? I just want her to be happy... I would worry that she'd stop breathing in the middle of the night and die from SIDS, or that she'd slip out of her swing somehow and it would keep swinging and attacking her and she'd die. She was (is) so small and helpless. I just felt an overwhelming desire to make all things GOOD for her. All of those 'what ifs' were really getting to me. He finally said something that really hit home for me: God was with her on the day she was born, and He'll be with her throughout her life. Knowing this has helped me when I start to think about all of those 'what ifs' again.
As I type this, she's sitting in my lap, babbling her cute little baby talk and her arm is somewhat flailing about since she still doesn't have gross motor control. She is the most beautiful, sweet baby that I've ever seen. Even when she wakes up at the crack of dawn, for a moment I think, UGH, awake already... but then I see her sweet face, and sometimes she even smiles, then my heart melts and I am JUST SO HAPPY to see and be with my sweet little baby again.
She is truly a blessing, and I thank God for her every day, multiple times a day. Now that we're in Virgina, we're really getting a chance to be together and get to know each other. She's one funny, gassy little gal! ;) We waited for her arrival for so.SO.long, and wondered what that day would be like. It's nice to know that it's over, and it worked out PERFECTLY and now we have a cute little wiggly baby to hold and love.
Tricky Business ("practice" labor & pre-delivery days)
-->
I think it's only appropriate to give credit where credit is due. A friend I cheered with in high school, Molly Hoskins, recently gave birth to her beautiful little man and also blogged about her birth experience. Reading hers made me realize how many details were already slipping from my mind. It was just what I needed to get mine out of my head! :)
All the movies make labor seem so fast and simple. Like IT’S TIME FOR THE BABY, LET’S GO! Then they show them rushing to the hospital, nearly running out of time, and the next scene there's this beautiful baby. Nobody told me that labor in real life is way more confusing. This is the story of my confusing labor, and next post I’ll tell you all about the day she arrived.
All the movies make labor seem so fast and simple. Like IT’S TIME FOR THE BABY, LET’S GO! Then they show them rushing to the hospital, nearly running out of time, and the next scene there's this beautiful baby. Nobody told me that labor in real life is way more confusing. This is the story of my confusing labor, and next post I’ll tell you all about the day she arrived.
Monday, June 4th
My due date was on Monday, the 4th of
June. As you may have read in other posts, I was in the unfamiliar city of San Antonio to be with Nic, so I didn’t
have a set doctor there. My doctor in
Lubbock was the last person to check any progress in dilation, and that was two
and a half weeks before (on the 17th of May). At that time, I was only dilated to a 1. Fast forward to the 4th, and still I
could feel nothing going on down there.
We were SO curious as to what the progress was, so we made up a little
reason to get checked. We decided to go
in to Labor & Delivery (L&D) and just tell them “I feel pressure down there,”
knowing that they would check my cervix/dilation.
We were right! They checked, and
I was dilated to a…. 1! :-( How disappointing right? So we figured we’d just keep hanging out and
she would come when she’s ready.
Tuesday
(WARNING: This will be way too much TMI for some of you…) Around 6:30 Tuesday evening, I was in the
bathroom, going #1 and then I was finished, but still sitting there. Another huge gush of water came out. I looked up and thought to myself, Did my
water just break? I told my mom what
happened (well, after pulling up pants & washing hands haha), and she asked me if I
wanted to go to L&D or what I wanted to do. I decided to call L&D to just ask, but
nobody answered. I tried to call Nic at
work to ask his opinion, but he didn’t answer.
I tried to call Nic’s (and my) nursing school friend who works in
L&D in Lubbock, but she didn’t answer.
I was so excited but apprehensive to go in, because I didn’t feel any
contractions. Finally Nic got off work
at 7:00, and called me. I explained the
situation. He decided to just walk up to
L&D since he was at the hospital anyway, and ask them. The instructions he passed on were to put a
pad in my undies, and if it was completely soaked within an hour to go in (this
would indicate amniotic fluid continuing to leak out). If the pad didn’t get soaked, then it would
indicate that the baby just kicked my bladder and pushed out more pee than I
thought I had. (I found this explanation
very bizarre, but I guess it’s possible.)
The pad didn’t get soaked through, and that was the end of that. Audra had kicked my
bladder. Who knew? (And yes, kind of emburassing...)
Wednesday
By now, it was two days past my due date and I was EXTREMELY
antsy. Imagine having to sit there and
kill time, knowing that at any moment, labor could start and you could be
experiencing one of the hugest moments of your life. I would give ANYTHING to know when that
moment was going to be! So we decided to
go back into L&D and tell them “we think my water broke, but we’re not sure”
(using Tuesday’s events as an excuse).
Even though we were pretty certain that it hadn’t broken, we knew they
would check the cervix. And we were
right. [Yes, I know, we were being that couple that keeps going in to the hospital. I didn't care one bit!] I was laying there, just crossing
my fingers (right hand only) & praying to God that something had progressed
down there. Then we got the news: I was
still only dilated to a 1. Talk about a
mood killer! I was so sad I could almost
cry. A church friend from Jeff City told me that her doctor had stripped her membranes and that her labor progressed very rapidly after that. I decided to give that a go. We asked the doctor who was seeing us if she’d
strip my membranes. She gave me some
sort of explanation why they didn’t really believe that stripping membranes did
any good, but after a little prodding from me, she finally agreed to do
it. The procedure was mildly painful for all of 15 seconds, and then it was done. Back “home” we went to hurry up and wait.
Thursday
Nothing. We continued to pray and wait.
Friday
I'd been looking forward to Friday all week because Nic's sister (Abi) and brother in law (Matt) were coming to town from Fort Worth. Of course, they were hoping to see the arrival of Audra, but if anything it'd be fun to see them for the weekend. I'd been having contractions all day, on and off. (!!!) They felt like Braxton Hicks, and that's what I figured they were due to their sporadic nature. The four of us had dinner at B.J.'s Brewhouse and then we showed Matt and Abi our carseat/stroller system and hung out with them for a bit. After we got home, the contractions started getting more frequent and my excitement level started going up. Nic had to work Saturday, so we went about our normal bedtime routine. When I laid down to bed, the contractions continued. I had read if the contractions continue or get stronger when laying, they could be the real thing. I started timing them with a contraction timer on my iPhone. They were getting closer together. They didn't seem to be getting more painful, but the timing was right, and they were definitely contractions. Around 2:30, I woke Nic to tell him they were about 4 minutes apart and asked him if we should go in. I decided to shower, just in case it was time, and see if they continued. They did. We called L&D and they said to come on in. I was so excited, knowing the next time we walked in our room/home away from home, we could have our new little BABY with us!!
We went into the hospital around 4:00am (Saturday) and explained what'd been happening. They checked my dilation, and this time there was progress! ...but only 1 cm of it. I was dilated to a 2. I couldn't believe it! They said they only admit if dilation is at a 4 or greater. By this time, it was about 5:45, and Nic needed to be at work around 6:30. The doctor told me to walk around the hospital for a few hours and then they'd see if it progressed. We all got some breakfast at the hospital, then Nic went ahead and went down a few floors to spend his day at work. Mom and I walked around every nook and cranny that hospital had to offer. I continued to have contractions, but they were starting to get less frequent. :-( In my heart, I knew it wasn't time for her to come yet, but I just wanted it to be so badly! After a few hours, we went back up and they checked the progress again. Much to my dismay, there was no progress.
The doctor told me it was just "practice labor" and that they "weren't real contractions." I was confused about why I would be having contractions at regular intervals, more painful than the typical Braxton Hicks, but they weren't real? The doctor said that my uterus was practicing having contractions at regular intervals. And that the "real" contractions would be MUCH more painful. She said I would definitely know. I was very discouraged, because I thought I DID know. She said the "real" contractions would probably come very soon; either that very same day, or a few days later, but she told me to not be discouraged-- this baby would be coming before too long! She advised me to go home and get some sleep.
By this time, it was around 8:00 Saturday morning. Mom and I went home to sleep. My dad was scheduled to arrive in San Antonio later that evening. I was excited to see him but oh.so.tired! And sad to be going home. :( I wanted my baby!!!
Saturday
I finally got to bed around 9am; sleepy from timing contractions and then being in the hospital all night. I felt bad sleeping the day away, especially since Matt & Abi were there to visit. But they completely understood and had their own fun in S.A. that day. I woke around 5:00pm, though I didn't really feel rested. The contractions had continued throughout my sleep, and kept waking me up. Later that evening I greeted my dad, then he & mom went out on a date night. (My mom was sounding like a high school girl the way she talked about how much she missed him before he arrived. It was cute.) Matt, Abi, Nic & I had dinner at Panera. My stomach was still in pain, and the contractions were still coming, though not regular, but somewhat strong. I only ordered a bowl of soup and couldn't even eat the whole thing.
Matt asked what the contractions felt like, and the only thing I could equate it to is this: the feeling when you've got to go #2 (haha) but there's no bathroom available and your stomach is just doing waves of pain because you've got to go. I think it feels like that, except stuck at the peak of the pain. That's what the "practice/fake" contractions felt like.
On the way back "home" after Panera, I felt my first "real" contraction. It was much more intense and nearly stopped me in my tracks. I didn't feel another like that until later that night. We went back to the hotel and said goodnight to mom & dad, then sat out by the pool. The 3 of them drank some beer on the nice breezy evening; I stuck with my Panera water. :) Around 10:00, the pool closed, and Matt & Abi went back to their hotel. Nic and I settled in. We talked all day about how great it would be if Audra came Sunday since Matt & Abi had to leave Sunday evening, and since my dad had finally made it to town. We watched some TV before bed and the hard contractions started coming. They weren't very close together, but I was excited to feel a different type of contraction than before. I went ahead and showered before bed, just in case I had to go into the hospital later.
Nic went ahead and went to bed (his first time sleeping since before we went in on Friday night), and fell asleep instantly. I, on the other hand, was timing contractions. Again. Second night in a row. I laid there with my phone on beside me and pushed the little button as soon as one came. This time I was squirming from the pain until it stopped and I pushed the button again. When I was really REALLY squirming from the pain and they were 4 min. apart, I woke Nic up and told him I thought it was time FOR REAL this time. This was about 1 am. We called L&D and they told us to come in. We called my parents and told them not to come just yet-- we'd call them if I got admitted.
We went to the hospital and the whole way there I was praying I'd be at a 4 or greater. When I finally got into triage and got checked, I was elated to hear I was at a 4! They went ahead and admitted me. We called mom and dad... excited that we wouldn't be heading back until we had a baby!
As you can guess, she ended up coming on Sunday. Her actual delivery is too long to include on this post, so I'll post that one next. But it just goes to show that labor is tricky! People kept asking me if I thought she was coming soon (the week and days before she came). I was like, I don't know?!? I've never had a baby before... I don't know what it feels like... I guess I was just supposed to have some motherly instinct or connection to her or something. But no. I had no idea what was happening down there. Of course things felt different; but all sorts of things felt different since being pregnant! I just couldn't tell what was actually the start of labor and what wasn't.
I'm excited to tell you how delivery went... and more excited to have it written for myself and to show Audra someday.
I'm excited to tell you how delivery went... and more excited to have it written for myself and to show Audra someday.
If you made it this far, thanks for reading! I hope you're happy, healthy and well!
Love, Stefanie
Love, Stefanie
Sunday, July 22, 2012
It's All So New
There has been SO MUCH happening since that last post! We welcomed the cutest, funniest, most precious and most loved baby EVER to the world on June 10 at 11:17 am. Audra Kayte Williams was 6 lbs and 7 oz, and was 19.5 inches long. She was born at San Antonio Military Medical Center. Her timing was SUCH a blessing from God. When I think about it too hard, it still makes me want to cry. I was so nervous that Nic would be working when she came (he wouldn't be able to leave his shift to come be with me if that were the case). She decided to come on the weekend when Uncle Matt & Aunt Abi (Nic's sis & bro in law) were in San Antonio visiting... and the day right after Grandpa came. It really was amazing. I doubt you care as much about this as I do, but listen to this: Matt & Abi came on Friday, and needed to leave on Sunday. My dad wasn't able to make it in until late Saturday night. Nic had off Saturday and Sunday off. Audra came on SUNDAY-- the day when all the visitors were there and Nic didn't have to work! A day sooner, and my dad wouldn't have been there. A day later, and Matt & Abi wouldn't have been there and Nic would have to be working. There were a few times after she was born when I was overcome with worry for her and her future (call it hormones if you must), but Nic was very reassuring saying that God was with us through her birth and He'll be with her through her whole life. In addition to what I just told you, I REALLY want to tell you all about the whole birthing process, but that will have to wait for another day.
Like I said, she was born on a Sunday in San Antonio. Nic graduated his Nurse Transition Program the following Friday. We drove that same day (Friday) home to Lubbock. The normally 6 hour drive took us 9 hours. Babies are A LOT of work! :)
We were home for about 2 weeks. In that time, my parents flew back to Missouri, we had Audra's newborn pictures taken, Andy & Kateigh (Nic's brother & sis in law) came from L.A., Abi & Matt came from Ft. Worth, we spent a LOT of time at Lolli & Pops house (Nic's mom and dad's), had our house packed up for the move to Virginia (Nic's new assignment now that his Air Force nurse training was complete) and said our goodbyes. We drove about 30 hours to Virginia and arrived on June 29 to our new home. Our things arrived on July 4, and we've ever so slooooowwwwwlllllllyyyyy been unpacking. My dad couldn't have said it better: my time is 90% looking after Audra, 10% anything else I need to do. Things are getting better each day. We can tell she's starting to "generally accept life" (as I had read is one of the stages of infancy) and is less fussy than she was right out of the womb.
Really, things couldn't be better with our little sweetie pie. She does everything she does WONDERFULLY. She eats wonderfully, poops and pees wonderfully (and by that, I mean A LOT), even sleeps wonderfully. I had been waking her for the first month to eat during the night... but the more I read that people are really split on whether this is necessary or not, I decided to stop and let her wake me. Just for night time. And since then, we've all be much better rested. Last night, she couldn't keep her eyes open around 10:30, so we put her down. She didn't wake up until around 8:00. Isn't that AMAZING?!? That's the longest she's slept so far. And she ate like she'd never eaten before when I went in to feed her. LoL. But she wasn't upset or anything, or acting like I was a bad mommy for letting her go so long without eating. So, as far as night feedings go, I'll let her wake up and tell me when she's ready (just like I do during the day).
Things here are slowly falling into place. We're trying out a church, and we'll continue to try different churches until we see all that we're really interested in and feel like we've found a good match. We're really looking for something similar to The Crossing in Columbia (Missouri). We LOVED how the Young Professionals group did a lot outside of church and therefore became a really close-knit bunch. We didn't find that in Lubbock and we both really wish we'd worked harder to have that instead of settling so quickly on a church. So we're not going to stop until we find that group we're looking for here.
I'm eager to make some friends. Haha that sounds so sad, or nerdy, or desperate... we just don't know anyone here. Nic knows some guys from work, and one of them just moved in across the street from us. I was able to meet his wife (who's from AUSTRAILIA!!), and their 3 kids (one of which is a 7 month old baby girl!), and I think we'll get together quite often. We've met other neighbors and people from church, but everything's still so new that we just don't really feel comfortable yet with anything. It'll be nice when the house is settled (pictures to come), and enough time has gone by that it's not awkward to get together with the new people we've just met. I forget how much time it takes to make new friends and build those relationships. But it'll happen.
I'm so enjoying the beautiful trees, and the fact that there's SO MUCH to do around here. Of course, I haven't done any of those fun things yet because I've been a feeding slave 90% of the time and been unpacking with the other 8% (2% is left for me to shower, use the bathroom, and eat).
I really can't wait to show you all pictures of things here. Now that we're here, I'll try to be more diligent about updating. I so appreciate you all reading. I hope your summer is going well (for all my teacher friends, I'm sure it's going WAY too fast!) and I hope you're staying cool. I love you all!
Stefanie
This is a picture of her birth announcement. Wish I had an electronic version.
Like I said, she was born on a Sunday in San Antonio. Nic graduated his Nurse Transition Program the following Friday. We drove that same day (Friday) home to Lubbock. The normally 6 hour drive took us 9 hours. Babies are A LOT of work! :)
We were home for about 2 weeks. In that time, my parents flew back to Missouri, we had Audra's newborn pictures taken, Andy & Kateigh (Nic's brother & sis in law) came from L.A., Abi & Matt came from Ft. Worth, we spent a LOT of time at Lolli & Pops house (Nic's mom and dad's), had our house packed up for the move to Virginia (Nic's new assignment now that his Air Force nurse training was complete) and said our goodbyes. We drove about 30 hours to Virginia and arrived on June 29 to our new home. Our things arrived on July 4, and we've ever so slooooowwwwwlllllllyyyyy been unpacking. My dad couldn't have said it better: my time is 90% looking after Audra, 10% anything else I need to do. Things are getting better each day. We can tell she's starting to "generally accept life" (as I had read is one of the stages of infancy) and is less fussy than she was right out of the womb.
Really, things couldn't be better with our little sweetie pie. She does everything she does WONDERFULLY. She eats wonderfully, poops and pees wonderfully (and by that, I mean A LOT), even sleeps wonderfully. I had been waking her for the first month to eat during the night... but the more I read that people are really split on whether this is necessary or not, I decided to stop and let her wake me. Just for night time. And since then, we've all be much better rested. Last night, she couldn't keep her eyes open around 10:30, so we put her down. She didn't wake up until around 8:00. Isn't that AMAZING?!? That's the longest she's slept so far. And she ate like she'd never eaten before when I went in to feed her. LoL. But she wasn't upset or anything, or acting like I was a bad mommy for letting her go so long without eating. So, as far as night feedings go, I'll let her wake up and tell me when she's ready (just like I do during the day).
Things here are slowly falling into place. We're trying out a church, and we'll continue to try different churches until we see all that we're really interested in and feel like we've found a good match. We're really looking for something similar to The Crossing in Columbia (Missouri). We LOVED how the Young Professionals group did a lot outside of church and therefore became a really close-knit bunch. We didn't find that in Lubbock and we both really wish we'd worked harder to have that instead of settling so quickly on a church. So we're not going to stop until we find that group we're looking for here.
I'm eager to make some friends. Haha that sounds so sad, or nerdy, or desperate... we just don't know anyone here. Nic knows some guys from work, and one of them just moved in across the street from us. I was able to meet his wife (who's from AUSTRAILIA!!), and their 3 kids (one of which is a 7 month old baby girl!), and I think we'll get together quite often. We've met other neighbors and people from church, but everything's still so new that we just don't really feel comfortable yet with anything. It'll be nice when the house is settled (pictures to come), and enough time has gone by that it's not awkward to get together with the new people we've just met. I forget how much time it takes to make new friends and build those relationships. But it'll happen.
I'm so enjoying the beautiful trees, and the fact that there's SO MUCH to do around here. Of course, I haven't done any of those fun things yet because I've been a feeding slave 90% of the time and been unpacking with the other 8% (2% is left for me to shower, use the bathroom, and eat).
(Note how small the cars are compared to these trees.)
I really can't wait to show you all pictures of things here. Now that we're here, I'll try to be more diligent about updating. I so appreciate you all reading. I hope your summer is going well (for all my teacher friends, I'm sure it's going WAY too fast!) and I hope you're staying cool. I love you all!
Stefanie
Monday, May 7, 2012
A Happy Heart [36 weeks]
I just had a WONDERFUL weekend with my handsome husband! He had a few days off from his clinicals so he was able to come home and meet me here on Friday evening. Here's a quick recap of my weekend and all the reasons I loved it:
Friday
After school, I went to get a pedicure since we were having pictures taken Saturday morning (the fact that my toes didn't even show b/c I was wearing heels is beside the point). Everything about this month-- the weather, the fact that there are 3 weeks left of school, the fact that the pool is open-- is screaming SUMMER! I opted for a bright pink with teal polka dots. For now, my summer is living on my toes. :)
THE HUSBAND: As if this even needs an explanation... every time I see his sweet smiley face and feel his arms around me, my heart melts and all is right in the world. He gave me my first Mother's Day present!!! Since he won't be here next weekend, he made sure it happened early. It consisted of a really precious card and then a Willow People figurine of a couple with their new baby. The title of it is Our Gift. My mom had gotten us one with a man and his pregnant wife, so this that he got me for Mother's Day was PERFECT! I know our Audra isn't quite here yet, but it's not too much longer! I cried happy tears and we sat in love until we were too hungry to sit any longer. :-D We ate at Cancun then watched TV in bed while I fell asleep (we were both pretty tired as he had just worked a night shift and... well... I'm about 9 months pregnant).
I felt like a giddy little school girl with my husband's presence near me for the rest of the weekend.
Saturday
The same lady that's taking Audra's newborn pics (Lynette Reeves with Only Imagine Photography) also took our maternity pictures. It was great to meet her, and I cannot WAIT to see what she did! We took them in two locations: 1) at the Veteran's Memorial where my dad swore Nic in as an AF officer, and then 2) at a local park where there are lots of trees and a pretty playa lake with a fountain. I'm thinking they'll look pretty sweet!
The rest of Saturday was spent doing CrossFit, finally eating Chipotle again (for some reason the thought of it made me nauseous for months), having dinner with his parents and taking home the baby clothes his mom washed. (She's pretty awesome, btw.)
Sunday
Sunday was our day of relaxation. We slept WAY in, watched a podcast from church, lounged some more then did a bit of shopping. I was able to get some foam paper to use as separators for Audra's clothes, a maternity swimsuit, and Nic got some classic children's stories he'd seen at Barnes & Noble (we got The Secret Garden and A Little Princess). I'm in love with the fact that he wants to read to her SO BADLY. I simply cannot wait to witness this! Almost too much cuteness for one heart to handle.
Nic helped me fine sort the baby clothes (his mom had pretty much already done this) and we got the separators in their spots. Looks good, don't you think?
After that, the only bad things about this weekend happened... and within minutes of each other: Nic left, then the garage door broke. Boo and boo again. I said my goodbyes and then shut the garage as I went inside and heard a huge loud noise as soon as I was in the house. I looked and saw that one of the springs had snapped. Well, crap. We knew it needed to be looked at b/c the springs were loose and it was making weird noises, and finally the thing fell apart. So it's out of commission for a while... hopefully our landlord will have it looked at in the near future.
And before I leave, here's the update:
How far along: 36 weeks tomorrow! 4 weeks till our due date!!!
How big is baby: Weighs about 5 lbs. now! And holy moly can I tell! ;)
Maternity clothes: Just bought a maternity swimsuit today. I don't care if those cute skinny college girls stare at my huge belly... it's HOT outside and I WANT TO SWIM! :) And plus my friend Kristine goes and she's pretty pregnant too, so it'll just be a little preggo party out there for us.
Sleep: Not good. I did make a new arrangement in which I sleep inclined and also with a pillow between my knees. This helps keep my hips from falling asleep, but it's a hassle to turn over since you have to move the pillow, move your belly, etc. I don't think I go more than 1 sleep cycle (about 1.5 hrs) without waking up. Yuck.
Movement: She's our little mover! I love it! Actually, yesterday was kind of a milestone in her movement: she actually hurt me! Her head is down and her feet are up, slanted to my right. She stretched and kicked my right rib right in the bone. I've heard of this happening, but her strength and sneakiness was startling. And we still have a whole month left.
When she's fully stretched out, which she does every now and then, I feel like her head is down past my hip bones and her feet are all the way up by my ribs. It amazes me how BIG she is! She's been pressing out more lately and I can actually feel her little feet if I put my hand under my ribs. If she curls her legs up extra, I can tell where they are. Sometimes when she stretches, her head (or hand) goes right into my bladder area and it's the most sudden insane urge to use the bathroom I've ever experienced to this point. Usually she'll stay that stretched out for only a few seconds, then she'll move back to where she was and the feeling will go away. I guess it's getting pretty cramped in there!
She gets the hiccups multiple times a day. It's fun for me to feel her rhythmic movements. It's fun to let other people feel those, too, since I know she can't stop them. :) Last night when I was sleeping she had them SO HARD that it was jolting my whole body. I was dreaming while this was happening, and I was telling someone in my dream that Audra was hiccuping and having them feel my stomach. Then I woke up and realized it was happening for real. It was kind of funny. She got them again later in the morning and again after we ate lunch. 3 times a day isn't uncommon for the hiccups; for us anyway.
Belly-button: An innie that is sticking out. You'll get to see it when the maternity pics are up.
Exercise: 4 times this past week. Woot woot! Monday, Tuesday, Thursday & Saturday. So easy & so quick, but it's something.
What I'm loving: The countdown! I've always been told + or - 2 weeks from the due date... so realistically, she could come in only 2 weeks! I can't believe how fast it's going by!
What I'm NOT loving: Not having a nursery. I had another little pity party moment there earlier in the month because so many of my friends are posting pics of their cute nurseries as they prepare for their babies. And they're due AFTER me. I've got a guest room with a bunch of baby stuff not at all in its place (except for the clothes). The crib isn't set up (and won't be until after we move), we've got no bedding and no decorations for the walls. I know all of this will fall into place VERY quickly after we get to Virginia... I just wish I could do it now. I'm ready to nest her room into perfection but I can't. My mom keeps telling me to keep my head up, that she'll help me get it all settled once we get to Virginia, and I fully believe her. So for now, I just stare at everything while I blow dry my hair in the mornings. I can't wait for her to have her own space.
What I miss: My husband, of course. Being able to bend over. Rolling over without using my hands and feet to propel me. Breathing like normal. Running errands without feeling like I ran a marathon (not that I ever have, but I can imagine).
That's all, and according to Nic, it's past my bedtime. Haha. Goodnight!
Friday
After school, I went to get a pedicure since we were having pictures taken Saturday morning (the fact that my toes didn't even show b/c I was wearing heels is beside the point). Everything about this month-- the weather, the fact that there are 3 weeks left of school, the fact that the pool is open-- is screaming SUMMER! I opted for a bright pink with teal polka dots. For now, my summer is living on my toes. :)
THE HUSBAND: As if this even needs an explanation... every time I see his sweet smiley face and feel his arms around me, my heart melts and all is right in the world. He gave me my first Mother's Day present!!! Since he won't be here next weekend, he made sure it happened early. It consisted of a really precious card and then a Willow People figurine of a couple with their new baby. The title of it is Our Gift. My mom had gotten us one with a man and his pregnant wife, so this that he got me for Mother's Day was PERFECT! I know our Audra isn't quite here yet, but it's not too much longer! I cried happy tears and we sat in love until we were too hungry to sit any longer. :-D We ate at Cancun then watched TV in bed while I fell asleep (we were both pretty tired as he had just worked a night shift and... well... I'm about 9 months pregnant).
I felt like a giddy little school girl with my husband's presence near me for the rest of the weekend.
The same lady that's taking Audra's newborn pics (Lynette Reeves with Only Imagine Photography) also took our maternity pictures. It was great to meet her, and I cannot WAIT to see what she did! We took them in two locations: 1) at the Veteran's Memorial where my dad swore Nic in as an AF officer, and then 2) at a local park where there are lots of trees and a pretty playa lake with a fountain. I'm thinking they'll look pretty sweet!
The rest of Saturday was spent doing CrossFit, finally eating Chipotle again (for some reason the thought of it made me nauseous for months), having dinner with his parents and taking home the baby clothes his mom washed. (She's pretty awesome, btw.)
Sunday
Sunday was our day of relaxation. We slept WAY in, watched a podcast from church, lounged some more then did a bit of shopping. I was able to get some foam paper to use as separators for Audra's clothes, a maternity swimsuit, and Nic got some classic children's stories he'd seen at Barnes & Noble (we got The Secret Garden and A Little Princess). I'm in love with the fact that he wants to read to her SO BADLY. I simply cannot wait to witness this! Almost too much cuteness for one heart to handle.
Nic helped me fine sort the baby clothes (his mom had pretty much already done this) and we got the separators in their spots. Looks good, don't you think?
After that, the only bad things about this weekend happened... and within minutes of each other: Nic left, then the garage door broke. Boo and boo again. I said my goodbyes and then shut the garage as I went inside and heard a huge loud noise as soon as I was in the house. I looked and saw that one of the springs had snapped. Well, crap. We knew it needed to be looked at b/c the springs were loose and it was making weird noises, and finally the thing fell apart. So it's out of commission for a while... hopefully our landlord will have it looked at in the near future.
And before I leave, here's the update:
How far along: 36 weeks tomorrow! 4 weeks till our due date!!!
How big is baby: Weighs about 5 lbs. now! And holy moly can I tell! ;)
Maternity clothes: Just bought a maternity swimsuit today. I don't care if those cute skinny college girls stare at my huge belly... it's HOT outside and I WANT TO SWIM! :) And plus my friend Kristine goes and she's pretty pregnant too, so it'll just be a little preggo party out there for us.
Sleep: Not good. I did make a new arrangement in which I sleep inclined and also with a pillow between my knees. This helps keep my hips from falling asleep, but it's a hassle to turn over since you have to move the pillow, move your belly, etc. I don't think I go more than 1 sleep cycle (about 1.5 hrs) without waking up. Yuck.
Movement: She's our little mover! I love it! Actually, yesterday was kind of a milestone in her movement: she actually hurt me! Her head is down and her feet are up, slanted to my right. She stretched and kicked my right rib right in the bone. I've heard of this happening, but her strength and sneakiness was startling. And we still have a whole month left.
When she's fully stretched out, which she does every now and then, I feel like her head is down past my hip bones and her feet are all the way up by my ribs. It amazes me how BIG she is! She's been pressing out more lately and I can actually feel her little feet if I put my hand under my ribs. If she curls her legs up extra, I can tell where they are. Sometimes when she stretches, her head (or hand) goes right into my bladder area and it's the most sudden insane urge to use the bathroom I've ever experienced to this point. Usually she'll stay that stretched out for only a few seconds, then she'll move back to where she was and the feeling will go away. I guess it's getting pretty cramped in there!
She gets the hiccups multiple times a day. It's fun for me to feel her rhythmic movements. It's fun to let other people feel those, too, since I know she can't stop them. :) Last night when I was sleeping she had them SO HARD that it was jolting my whole body. I was dreaming while this was happening, and I was telling someone in my dream that Audra was hiccuping and having them feel my stomach. Then I woke up and realized it was happening for real. It was kind of funny. She got them again later in the morning and again after we ate lunch. 3 times a day isn't uncommon for the hiccups; for us anyway.
Belly-button: An innie that is sticking out. You'll get to see it when the maternity pics are up.
Exercise: 4 times this past week. Woot woot! Monday, Tuesday, Thursday & Saturday. So easy & so quick, but it's something.
What I'm loving: The countdown! I've always been told + or - 2 weeks from the due date... so realistically, she could come in only 2 weeks! I can't believe how fast it's going by!
What I'm NOT loving: Not having a nursery. I had another little pity party moment there earlier in the month because so many of my friends are posting pics of their cute nurseries as they prepare for their babies. And they're due AFTER me. I've got a guest room with a bunch of baby stuff not at all in its place (except for the clothes). The crib isn't set up (and won't be until after we move), we've got no bedding and no decorations for the walls. I know all of this will fall into place VERY quickly after we get to Virginia... I just wish I could do it now. I'm ready to nest her room into perfection but I can't. My mom keeps telling me to keep my head up, that she'll help me get it all settled once we get to Virginia, and I fully believe her. So for now, I just stare at everything while I blow dry my hair in the mornings. I can't wait for her to have her own space.
What I miss: My husband, of course. Being able to bend over. Rolling over without using my hands and feet to propel me. Breathing like normal. Running errands without feeling like I ran a marathon (not that I ever have, but I can imagine).
That's all, and according to Nic, it's past my bedtime. Haha. Goodnight!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)