Not-So-Silent Night

Well, we knew this day would come and here it is.  Nic's first night shift at Langley.  He worked a few in Lubbock right out of nursing school, which meant that I would jet out of school as fast as the kids in order to have dinner with him before he went in.  It was an adjustment.  At the same time, I was pregnant and working with some very dramatic 14-year-olds, so I was more than ready to go to bed with or without him.  That time around, I only woke up to pee.  This time around, things are a bit different.

Audra's sleep during the night hasn't been very consistent.  There is usually one night a week when she won't wake up at all and I'm singing my praises the following morning.  Then it seems the very next night she may wake up 2 or (Lord help me) 3 times.  I haven't exactly pin-pointed the source of her waking.  Is she hungry? (I feed her each waking.)  Is she just wanting company?  Is she in pain from teething?  I wish she would be more consistent so I could figure it out.  Sometimes when she wakes, she talks and coos like the sweet, happy girl she can be.  Other times, it's an abrupt cry that doesn't end until I get to her side, or until she starts eating (those times make me think teething).  Waking up multiple times to feed a baby and put her back to sleep is exhausting.  If I do it all under an hour, I consider myself lucky.  But about 25% of the time, she'll fall asleep eating and I'll ever.so.slowly. and gently set her down in bed and her eyes will spring open.  Then she'll start crying and I'll have to pick her back up to rock her to sleep all over again.  Sometimes even the second time, she'll wake up.  Nights like that, Nic usually ends up giving it a go because I'll have been awake going on 2 hours at that point.  He's saved my sleep many MANY times.  I'm a little nervous to not have his help.  SINGLE PARENTS, HOW IN THE WORLD DO YOU DO IT?!? Nights when I've gotten up 2 or more times with her, he'll usually get up with her in the morning and let me sleep in to make up for lost time. 

Now he's working nights.  Which means he won't be there on those random nights she refuses to go back down.  And he'll be ready for bed at 7 am, which means I'll definitely be waking up with her.  He assured me he'll find a way to help me catch up on sleep, but it would take some time and him getting used to his new schedule.  And I believe him.

I know a lot of you reading this also have new babies, or had a baby once upon a time.  Do your babies wake up all the time too?  What do you do to help with your exhaustion?  I know a few of you are going to tell me to bed share with Audra.  ;-)  But Nic and I decided a long time ago that isn't something we want to do.  We just need our own "us" space.  I'm fine with holding my baby until she falls asleep, and when she's out of the crib, I'll lay down next to her in her room when needed.  But we don't want her falling asleep in our bed at night.  So getting up with her is a must.  Do your babies ever wake up once they hit the bed?  Do you have any tricks to make that exchange easier?  Currently, we do a lot of light shaking/vibrating/patting, and rocking while in the chair.  When she's good & asleep, we get up & continue to vibrate her while we walk to her bed and while we lay her down.  Even when she's down, sometimes we'll lightly shake her little body or vibrate the mattress to ease the transition.  Usually all that does the trick.  But like I said, there are those few times when she wakes right up as soon as her body hits the bed and we start all over again.

So nights are not typically silent for this family.  It's a good thing I really love her.  I can't breathe her or smell her or kiss her enough, and I admit that feeding her in the still of the night will forever be one of my favorite memories.  I just don't want to do it every day.  ;-)

As always, I hope you're happy, healthy, & well!
Love you all!